In the Event That You Have Accidentally Swallowed the Higgs Boson

By: Ryan, on April 9, 2009

Ten steps to follow in case you accidentally ingest the Higgs Boson.

“6. If the Higgs boson begins creating mass in your esophagus or stomach before you reach a hospital, you will need to perform an immediate bosonectomy on yourself. Luckily, surgical knowledge is not necessary. Just choose from the array of probable outcomes that will manifest themselves upon your decision to perform surgery, and make the one most favourable to yourself into reality. Be sensible?¢‚Ǩ‚Äùdo not wait for the outcome in which you successfully remove the boson and win the lottery and grow wings”

Via Kottke.

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